
Is marriage destined? In other words, Is it already destined to who you will be married to?
According to my search there's no Islamic source from Quraan or Hadith that supports this misconception, yet it's widely accepted by many if not most Muslims.
There are several robust Hadiths urge Muslims both males and females to be careful with their partner selections but if marriage is already destined then those Hadiths are nonsense! For instance, there's a well known Hadith affirming that one of the son's right over the father is to select a good mother for him, if marriage is destined by Allah then the father can't be held liable in such a case, hence it can't be a right! Another well known Hadith urges people to select the partner (husband or wife) from a reputable family rather than a notorious one. Other well known Hadith is warning Muslims from marrying to a beautiful girl that was raised up in a bad environment, etc ..
I believe the misconception emits from a misunderstanding of "destiny" and "knowledge of Allah", obviously people tend to not differentiate between the two. "Destiny" is what Allah destined, it's something that will happen to you no matter what and is out of your control, an example of that is time of death. "Knowledge of Allah" is what Allah knows, He knows what was, what is, and what will be, but this knowledge doesn't effect our actions, for instance if Allah knows that you will buy a certain thing at certain place and time, that knowledge won't cause the purchase, it's still you who would decide and do it even though He knows it would happen beforehand. How does Allah know all that?! We don't know but surely He does. Nevertheless, Allah may destine to some people to whom they will get married to but I can't see it's destined for all people like the case of death.
So, if you mishandle a marriage proposal or neglect getting married, don't say "Allah didn't destine that person for me" or "Allah didn't want it to happen"! You are responsible and liable about your decisions and actions not "Destiny"!
NOTE: This little article seems to be the most popular in this blog and apparently many girls have this question about marriage and destiny, I urge them to read another related article I published in this blog titled 'Is it Islamically acceptable for a woman to propose to a man?'